Ignorance and Mischief Nigeria's Greatest Problems

Published in THISDAY of June 1, 2004 @ Page 41.

Funke Aboyade's State of Emergency: More Questions Than Answers, provoked this article. Her search for answers will not be fruitless because I have a two-word answer to any Nigeria-centric question: Ignorance and/or Mischief. Every problem in Nigeria could be traced to either ignorance or mischief or both - Bola Ige, Ngige, Egbo Egbo, Yelwa riot, Kano riots, CAN my foot, Ex- parte Injunctions, executive immunity, declaration of state of emergency, resource control, Sharia, Fani-Kayode versus Abubakar Umar, Oba of Benin versus Ooni of Ife, Federal Republic of Nigeria versus Unitary Republic of Nigeria, whatever. Searching for any other answer is same as seeking for the testicles of Monomorium pharaonis, one of the tiniest ants on earth, and will avail my learned friend nothing.

Nigeria suffers from very serious, intertwined, chronic diseases of ignorance and mischief. Ignorance, because it is only in Nigeria that the provisions of the Constitution are flouted with impunity by those who swore to protect it, and mischief, because it is difficult to reconcile the brilliance of Nigerians in the conduct of their personal affairs, with what obtains when they go into public service. It is only in Nigeria that those who swore to uphold and defend the Constitution routinely and openly assail it, thereby making the devil part of the details of any state action. Are we ignorant of the fact that British Constitutional monarchy is different from the American presidential system, or is our refusal to review our old laws to fit into our new system another product of our mischief? When our lawmakers and governors jet off to London to have real-life study of "parliamentary procedures" only to come and practice "presidential system" at home, are they being mischievous or are they ignoramuses of the rankest specie? Do we need a preacher to tell us that it is inconvenient to put old wines in new wineskin?

And speaking of old wines in new wins-skin, the Bible is my first authority on how only two words answer a plenitude of questions. Though this article will pretend to discuss law and democracy, to be relevant in any calling in President Obasanjo's Nigeria, you need ostensible display of religious inclination. The Biblical account of the visit the mother of the sons of Zebedee paid Jesus is very relevant to our discuss. The woman, says the Bible, came with her sons, worshipping Jesus, and desiring a certain thing of him. And Jesus said to her, "What do you want?" She replied, "Grant that these my two sons may sit, the one on your right hand, and the other on the left, in your kingdom." But Jesus answered and said, "You know not what you ask. Are you able to drink of the cup that I shall drink of, and to be baptized with the baptism that I am baptized with? And they (Mrs. Zebedee and her children) said to him, "We are able." The document purporting to be the Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigerian is a lie! WE THE PEOPLE OF NIGERIA, contrary to what is contained in that document in circulation, HEREBY DECLARE THAT WE HAVE NO CONSTITUTION!

Anyway, on a less serious note, those who are very familiar with the American Constitution, the model on which Nigeria's democracy has been hinged since 1979, will always wonder if those in authority in Nigeria read the document at all. Recently, Justice Anthonin Scalia of the United States Supreme Court described the American Constitution as "extraordinary and amazing" and "a brilliant piece of work". He further said, "that the Constitution's true meaning must always be protected." He however lamented that now, "people just don't revere it like they used to."

In 1979, members of Nigeria's Constituent Assembly, having been captivated by this "brilliant piece of work", handed a slightly modified version over to the military to enact as a decree. General Olusegun Obasanjo, as the then military dictator, signed the document into law. It became the foundation of Nigeria's legal landscape, the tree to which every other law must conform with, and append to as a branch, for survival. If any such law is inconsistent with the provisions of the Constitution, that law cannot abide; it must be cut-off.

It is easy to fall in love with Justice Scalia's beloved document and its practice; a document so delicately balanced and so jealously implemented, without fear or favor. I, for one, fell in love with due process and the doctrine of separation of powers, a doctrine that provides a self-executing safeguard against the encroachment or aggrandizement of one of the three co-equal branches of government at the expense of another. I found out that rule of law and democracy are truly two inseparable Siamese twins.
American culture and tradition are based only on written laws, and nobody is above the law. American law enforcement agents at every level use the same vigor to address any infraction of the law, whether you are the president and commander in chief or a recent immigrant, thereby giving unto any "Caesar" what is due to that "Caesar". Applying the law is consistence, not capricious or malicious, and it is the consistency that makes for certainly, social, political, and economic stability and the attendant prosperity. I can boast, with every degree of moral certainty that, should anything happen to me, an immigrant in the United States as at today, the government must be satisfied there was no foul play. Any suspicion of foul play will invite a full-scale investigation, and any person connected therewith shall be brought to book. And this is without any cost to my family. Even the Attorney General of Nigeria, the Chief law Officer, cannot boast this way about his own dear life.

When readers see the real-life recording of frightened nine black children being escorted to school in Little Rock by a federalized (by President Dwight D. Eisenhower) Arkansas National Guard or read the story of James Meredith, who was the first Black at the University of Mississippi, they will know why Americans are so patriotic. James was escorted to the campus by Federal troops on the orders of President J. F. Kennedy. The troops stayed on the campus until he graduated! White, Black, and colored American troops stayed at Ol' Missi, not to protect James, but to uphold and defend the Constitution of the United States; James was merely a direct beneficiary. In Nigeria, we have Odi and Zakibiam to show how the military is used to protect the Constitution.

And that takes me back to the response Jesus gave to Mrs. Zebedee and her children. Did our Constituent Assembly members know what they were asking for when they recommended the American Constitution in 1979? Successive governments adopt, assault, and rape the masterpiece with frenzied consistency. The current administration, like those before it, lives up to the lamentations of Justice Scalia, showing no reverence to the brilliant piece of work. The final answer Jesus gave to the Zebedee family was, "You will drink my cup, but to sit at my right hand and at my left is not mine to grant, but it is for those for whom it has been prepared by my Father." Yes, we are now drinking the cup we asked for, but we cannot sit in the Kingdom of Democracy and Rule of Law. We cannot enjoy the dividends that come with democracy because we asked for the American system out of ignorance and practice it with mischief.

Let the truth be told, Nigerians lack the moral and political courage to run a Presidential system. Our history and culture is rooted in feudalism, oppression, and lawlessness. Just check out section 184 of the Evidence Act to see feudalism in action. Why should that section co-exist with our Constitutional provisions for equality before the law and fair hearing? While the United States started out with a Constitutional ban on nobility, Nigeria and her mother Britain entrenched nobility in their laws. But having produced world-class academicians and technocrats, our problem now is rooted on either ignorance or mischief or both. Ignorance and mischief makes it difficult for many to contribute meaningfully whenever Nigerians myriad problems come up for discussion. You will always be asking yourself, "Are my fellow discussants real 'mumus' or just playing 'mumu'?" To 'play mumu' with our national affairs is the height of mischief!

Justice Anthonin Scalia's "brilliant piece of work", which he spends many hours everyday thinking about, is like a beautiful woman - a good wife to be protected and died for by those who appreciate beauty, or a prostitute to be raped and used to satisfy selfish desires by ne'er-do-wells. While American's are ready to die, and indeed do die for her, Nigerians use her to ascend to power, then rape her to death. Our political class is like the proverbial monkey - giving the monkey your golden cup to drink from is never a problem, but retrieving your cup always is. It is even worse when the monkey grabs your cup without your consent! This is the monkey-functional equivalent of a military coup or a rigged election.

Recently, a colleague forwarded an email to me - one of these authorless mail that is a by product of internet culture. I am not in the habit of sending out such mail to my friend or colleagues but this one is too good not to share. According to this urban legend, a little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is Politics?" Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I am the head of the family, so call me The President. Your mother is the administrator of the money, so we call her the Government. We are here to take care of your needs, so we
will call you the People. The nanny, we will consider her the Working Class. And your baby brother, we will call him the Future. Now think about that and see if it makes sense." So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what Dad has said.

Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper. So the little boy goes to his parent's room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not
wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed. The next morning, the little boy say's to his father, "Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now." The father says, "Good, son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about." The little boy replies, "The President is screwing the Working Class while the Government is sound asleep. The People are being ignored and the Future is in deep shit." And that is Nigeria for you!

Do we really understand what we asked for when we adopted the American Presidential System? Are we able to "drink the cup" that comes with the system? Unfortunately, the powers that be have not given the Nigerian people the opportunity to respond, like the Zebedee's family, "We are able." On the other hand, maybe the people will answer like the Ethiopian eunuch in Acts of the Apostles, "How can we understand unless someone teaches us". The President, the Government, the Working Class, the People, and the Future must sit down and discuss. Only then can we separate the ignorant from the mischievous and move our nation forward; the call for a Sovereign National Conference is not a bad idea after all.

Emeka Maduewesi, Esq.

Emeka Maduewesi is admitted to practice law in Nigeria and the State of California. He is the Publisher of www.nigerianlawregistry.com and works full time with the litigation department of Townsend and Townsend and Crew, an Intellectual Property and Anti--trust law firm in San Francisco, California.